


My One and Only

by TheFirstMrsHummel



Category: Schitt's Creek
Genre: M/M, Mild Hurt/Comfort, Post Meet The Parents, S5 Ep 11
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-23
Updated: 2019-03-23
Packaged: 2019-11-28 07:42:32
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18205526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheFirstMrsHummel/pseuds/TheFirstMrsHummel
Summary: This is my first Patrick POV story. Big thanks to Dan Levy’s writing and Noah Reid’s performance for peeling back all of Patrick’s layers so I could finally understand him enough to do so.A shout out and fist bump to all us only children out there.





	My One and Only

Being an only child was both a blessing and a curse at the same time.

On the blessing side, all the love and support you could imagine was at Patrick’s fingertips. His parents would have welcomed a large, boisterous family, but Patrick arrived later on in their marriage, and no siblings followed in the subsequent years. Clint and Marci took all the love they would have given six or seven children and lavished it all on Patrick. He had never lacked material things, attention or affection, and he tried never to take any of that for granted.

On the curse side was the pressure. Not from his folks, of course, they had never tried to force or cajole him into anything. It was an internalized pressure that came that knowing that as far as his parent’s hopes and dreams went, he was it. It’s why he always tried so hard to do well in school and extracurriculars, why he suffered through a job he hated at a small but successful Business Law firm and through an engagement to a woman he didn’t love in anything but the most platonic of ways. It’s why he was so disappointed in himself when he couldn’t keep up the charade anymore; why he quit his job, broke things off with Rachel for good, and ran away so his parents wouldn’t have to see the shame and failure in his face every day. But most of all, it was that pressure to be exactly what was expected and nothing more that caused him to hide the best thing that had ever happened to him from them – his all-encompassing love for David Rose.

They were back at his apartment now, David in black and gray loungewear, and Patrick in blue sweatpants and his soft, faded Pearl Jam t-shirt. As they spooned on the couch comfortably, Patrick marveled again at how David had somehow turned the worst day of his life into the best. He’d been so loving and supportive; not that he wasn’t always, but the whole situation must have been so stressful and anxiety-provoking for David. He’d put it all aside for Patrick selflessly, stuffing his emotions away and focusing on taking care of Patrick and his family. Now that everything was okay, though, it was time to return the favor.

“Hey, can we talk about something?” Patrick asked, turning in David’s arms. “Let’s sit up for a minute.”

“Okay,” David responded slowly. “Is something wrong?” His expression was tinged with worry when they were finally settled and could see each other’s faces.

“I already told you that you made everything okay for me. I just want to do the same thing for you.”

Worry changed quickly to confusion. “I’m sorry, what?”

“When you asked me if my parents only knew you as my business partner, and you realized it was true, I could see how devastated you were. I’m so sorry, David.”

“I know you are. This is all water under the bridge, we don’t have to rehash-“

Patrick cupped David’s cheek, brushing his thumb over David’s lips to silence his protest. “Yes, we do. You pushed your hurt aside so I could concentrate on dealing with the most terrifying thing I’ve ever had to do.”

“Sometimes you have to put a pin in an issue so you can focus on more urgent matters. You taught me that when we were opening the store.”

“That’s true, and I’m not saying you didn’t make the right decision to let it go in the moment. But I hope I also taught you that pinning something is a temporary measure, not something that makes a problem disappear. We need to unpin, David.”

“I don’t want to ruin tonight.” The worry was back in his boyfriend’s eyes, and Patrick wanted nothing more than to be as soothing and supportive as David had been for him.

“You couldn’t ruin tonight if you tried.” He leaned in and kissed David, quick and soft. “I know you know why I didn’t tell my parents about you. You understood that it was a justifiable reason, but your feelings are just as valid as mine. I hurt you, and we need to unpack that so we can get past it.”

The tears were back in David’s eyes, but this time Patrick had the mental and emotional bandwidth to comfort him. 

“We’re human, David, so we’re going to hurt each other from time to time no matter how much we try not to. But we need to be able to talk about it when we do. There is nothing you can say to me right now or ever that will make me feel any differently about you.”

Patrick watched David struggle, then fail to hold back his tears. “I was upset that you didn’t tell them. But what killed me is that you let me believe that they knew. All I could think about was that I’d been living a lie for the past year, every single time I talked to them on the phone.” David buried his face in his hands, heaving a sob.

“I’m so sorry,” Patrick repeated, rubbing David’s back the same way David had rubbed his earlier that day. Part of him wanted to take David into his arms, but he knew that would lead to hugging and kissing and eventually sex, when what David really needed was to purge the pain and stress of the day. Patrick was done taking the easy way out. That was what had gotten them in their current situation, after all.

David raised his head, wiping his eyes. “I need a tissue,” he said, marching over to the ones on the bedside table. He blew his nose, but brought the whole box back with him when he sat next to Patrick again. It seemed like the short break had braced David a bit. “Even this afternoon, you tried to make me believe that they knew at first. It was only because I kept pushing that you admitted the truth. I felt so…betrayed, and stupid too.”

“You are not stupid,” said Patrick, wishing he could cry himself. “I did let you believe it, even actively encouraged you to believe it. I don’t have any excuses. Reasons, but not excuses. I let not telling them go on to the point where you understandably assumed I’d told them, and I was too scared to tell you that I still hadn’t had the nerve. I was afraid you would think it was because I was ashamed of you, of us and what we have, when nothing could be further from the truth. It just snowballed to the point where I wasn’t being honest with any of the three people I love more than anything, and my brain just shut down whenever I tried to think about how to fix it.”

David looked down for a moment, like he was trying to collect himself. Finally he met Patrick’s eyes. “When I went to see your parents to smooth things over with the gift basket, your dad and mom were upset and feeling guilty, thinking they’d done something wrong to make you feel like you couldn’t tell them about us. You wanted me to be honest, so I’m being honest with you. You hurt them too, Patrick.”

Patrick felt like he’d taken a blow to the chest, but absorbed it. “I’ll talk to them about it tomorrow before they leave. I’ll do everything I can to make this right with all of you.”

No more running. No more hiding. Not ever again.

“You have already made things right with me.” David grabbed Patrick’s hands. “As much as I didn’t want to have this conversation, you were right to push for it. I need to be honest with you too. I feel like maybe we can never go wrong if we just keep being honest with each other, especially about the hard stuff.”

“I think that sounds like a plan.” Patrick took a tissue for himself, thinking about what he’d decided at the café as he danced with David.

He couldn’t wait to let go of the last secret he’d been holding – that he was going to ask David Rose to marry him.


End file.
